Heroes of 9/11: Jack Grandcolas reflects on the loss of his wife and unborn child
PEBBLE BEACH, Calif. (KION & AP) For the first time since 2003, Jack Grandcolas has traveled to the Flight 93 National Memorial in Pennsylvania to mark the 20th anniversary of the September 11th attacks, and the death of his pregnant wife, Lauren Grandcolas.
"Every year it's a gut punch. There's no question. We'll live with the scars the rest of our lives," Grandcolas said, speaking from his home in Pebble Beach.
The 40 passengers and crew aboard Flight 93 are often called the heroes of 9/11, helping to stop an attack on the Capitol in Washington, D.C.
Twenty years later, Grandcolas still remembers waking up that fateful morning. He didn't know it yet, but his entire life had changed. Two planes had hit the World Trade Center, and 34 minutes later, the Pentagon was hit. A fourth hijacked plane, United Airlines Flight 93, was headed toward the Capitol.
The passengers and crew of Flight 93 fought back and drove the plane into an empty field in Shanksville, Pennsylvania. All 40 people aboard the flight died that morning, including Jack's wife, Lauren Grandcolas. She was three months pregnant with their first child.
His wife wasn't supposed to be on that flight. While Jack was sleeping, Lauren had called twice, leaving two voicemails. The first was good news. She had gotten on an earlier flight home from New Jersey to San Rafael, California. The second time, Lauren called from the plane. It would be the last time he would ever hear her voice.
"The first few years, going back to the memorial was important to be there, to be at the site. But it was extremely difficult and hard to take. And for my own health, I decided I would not return for the memorial anniversary until it was completed," said Grandcolas. "Ironically, it's completed and it's the 20th anniversary. They coincide."
For years after, Jack would spend September 11th doing things Lauren loved, like going for a bike ride or taking a quiet walk on the beach.
"And then I would end the day by going down to her Lauren Place on Fourth Street [in San Rafael] and leave some flowers, a note and read the notes and the flowers that other people had left in her memory," recalls Grandcolas. "I think that tranquility helped me get through that mounting pressure and anxiety of what they call an anniversary."
On Friday night, Grandcolas went back to the site where his wife passed. 40 lanterns carried by family and friends were placed below the memorial, at the names of each of the passengers and crew members of Flight 93.
Now 20 years later, Grandcolas says he wants Americans to remember how the country was able to come together right after 9/11.
"This country was united from sea to shining sea and today, maybe now would be a good time to let the divisiveness drop, let the knee-jerk vitriol drop. Just take a minute to pause and deep look deep into your own soul."
Grandcolas is writing a book about the grieving process. It's set to be released next April when his child would have turned 20 years old.
